AliceLovesInternet

sararye: Awesome :)

Sun, 23 Dec 2012 13:30:45 -0500

sararye:

Awesome :)

Sheldon……Joins Glee

Sun, 24 Jun 2012 18:56:19 -0400

Sheldon……Joins Glee

Photo

Sun, 24 Jun 2012 18:51:39 -0400

62 Things the Avengers are Not Allowed to Do.

Sun, 24 Jun 2012 16:37:12 -0400

1. Tony is not allowed to replace the entire contents of the cafeteria with pop-tarts just because Thor has declared it the ‘food of the gods.’

2. Natasha is not allowed to interrogate new S.H.I.E.L.D. employees and dispose of the ones she deems unworthy.

3. Clint is not allowed to continue insisting that is the final step of the interview process to terrified new hires.

4. Tony is not allowed to broadcast sing-along songs into the Hulk-cage, no matter amusing he finds teaching Hulk “Teddy Bear, Teddy Bear, turn around”

5. Clint is not allowed to put the security feed of the Hulk’s Teddy Bear dance on Youtube.

6. Bruce is not allowed to hack into personnel files to look up blackmail material on Director Fury.

7. Tony is not allowed to insist that he’s already done so and that Fury’s middle name is Rainbow Sprinkles…. Because it isn’t.

8. Thor is not allowed to be naked at Headquarters. Ever.

9. Steve is not allowed to address any female S.H.I.E.L.D. agents as ‘little lady,’ ‘broad,’ or ‘dame.’ It only ends in getting slapped.

10. Agent Coulson’s name isn’t “Mom.”

11. Director Fury should never again be addressed as “Dad”

12. Agent Hill is not the Avenger’s wicked stepmother.

13. Clint is not allowed to lurk in the shadowy rafters spying on people, unless specifically instructed to do so for an official S.H.I.E.L.D. sanctioned mission.

14. ‘Operation Irritate the Fuck Out of Nick Fury’ is not an official mission, no matter what Tony or Natasha say to the contrary.

15. Debriefings should not be preceded by tequila shots.

16. Debriefings should not be followed by tequila shots.

17. There are to be no shots of any kind during debriefings.

18. Thor and Hulk will wait to fight until after the battle is over.

19. Tony Stark is not God’s gift to women.

20. The Avengers do not need matching uniforms.

21. Tony and Bruce are not allowed to have a contest to see who can make a bigger “boom” in the lab.

22. Thor is not allowed to join in and make the biggest boom with his hammer.

23. The Avengers will not be celebrating Steve’s 94th birthday.

24. The laboratory is not Tony and Bruce’s ‘Super Secret Genius Clubhouse.’ They are not allowed to bar entry to employees based on IQ test results.

25. The Avengers are not making a promotional pin-up calendar. Or a sex tape.

26. Iron Man is not making a promotional pin-up calendar. Or a sex tape.

27. Tony Stark is not making a promotional pin-up calendar. Or a sex tape.
28. Thor is not allowed to ‘bring down the wrath of Odinson’ on the person who ate the last package of pop-tarts.

29. Pants are not optional at team meetings.

30. ‘Pepper said it was okay’ is not a good enough reason to defy a director order from command.

31. The words “What’s the worst that could happen?” are never to be uttered on a mission ever again.

32. MC Hammer did not write Thor a theme song.

33. Gumby is not the love child of Bruce Banner and Reed Richards.

34. Natasha and Clint are not allowed to impersonate members of the clergy ever again. Ever.

35. Blasting ‘Don’t Worry, Be Happy’ at top volume into Bruce’s room on loop overnight is not an effective way to suppress the Hulk.

36. Hawkeye is not sitting in the rafters waiting to pick off people playing Galaga on their computer during work hours.

37. Tony is not allowed to bribe Natasha and Clint to physically, emotionally or psychologically torture General Ross for being ‘a great big douchebucket’ and ‘being mean to Brucie-kins.’

38. Steve is ‘Captain America’ not ‘Captain New York and those 49 other, lesser states.’

39. ‘Hulk SMASH!’ is not an effective diplomatic policy.

40. Tony is not allowed to buy the Dodgers and move them back to Brooklyn to apologize for lighting Steve’s hair on fire.

41. The phrase ‘Trust me, I’m a doctor’ never leads anywhere good.

42. It is not funny to dare Bruce to drink three quarts of green food coloring before a urine test.

43. Steve is not to be introduced as ‘Captain Tightpants’ or ‘The All-American Virgin.’

44. The Avengers do not ‘charge into battle, naked like the Celts.’ Except for The Hulk. Sometimes.

45. Natasha’s glare is not in fact fatal. Tony is not allowed to continue implying that it is.

46. Tony is not allowed to convince Bruce to help him make death ray goggles so that it will be.

47. The Avengers are not allowed to overthrow the American government, just because they didn’t like the results from the last election.

48. The Avengers are not allowed to overthrow any government, without checking in with S.H.I.E.L.D. first.

49. Clint is not allowed to sell Thor any ‘magic beans.’

50. Natasha and Clint are not allowed to try to sell Tony to another planet, even if they are promised really cool new weapons in exchange.

51. Tony and Bruce are not allowed to go to any science conferences without a chaperone.

52. A robot Tony built does not count as a chaperone.

53. Nikola Tesla is not a vampire being held in the bowels of S.H.I.E.L.D. headquarters.

54. Tony and Bruce are not allowed to go searching for him in the name of Science!

55. Clint’s super-power is not ‘being super-annoying.’

56. The following words and phrases are never to be uttered over communication devices during an active mission ever again: “Exploring sexuality,” “Necrophilia,” “It’s getting hot in herr, so take off all your clothes,” “I hate everyone on this mission and I wish they’d die in a fire,” “Nick Fury can go suck on a big bag of sausages,” references to Bruce’s giant stash of weed, mention of anyone’s erection, or “Shawarma.”

57. If it makes Tony giggle for more than 30 seconds, it isn’t allowed.

58. If it makes Natasha crack a smile, it’s probably illegal.

59. Thor taking Jane to see Asgard does not count as an alien abduction. Clint should stop referring to it as such.

60. Just because Bruce agreed to work in Tony’s lab, does not mean he needs to get a “Property of Stark Industries” tattoo.

61. Tony is not allowed to design a robot to draw said tattoo on Bruce when he falls asleep in the lab.

62. Post-mission reports to Director Fury should not start out ‘So let me explain…’

Ohhh Tom…….. ;) xx

Sun, 24 Jun 2012 16:02:24 -0400

Ohhh Tom…….. ;) xx

What is up with the whole same-sex-marriage thing? Why...

Sun, 24 Jun 2012 16:01:27 -0400

What is up with the whole same-sex-marriage thing? Why isn’t it legal. Nothing is different.

kettlebag: “Oh, there go the Hummel-Andersons! Isn’t little...

Sun, 10 Jun 2012 20:21:45 -0400

kettlebag:

“Oh, there go the Hummel-Andersons! Isn’t little Elizabeth getting so big?”

—

Some INCREDIBLY sketchy/messy future!Klaine, walking their dog in Central Park, very much in love.

Reblog if you're a girl who likes girls, a boy who likes boys, or a person who believes it shouldn't matter.

Sun, 10 Jun 2012 20:12:27 -0400

fireandiceandrageandkittens:

saygoodbyetothevowsyoumake:

Why hasn’t everybody in the world reblogged this already.

Not enough notes. This needs all the notes. Reblog or we’re not friends anymore.

Girl who likes girls and also boys but it shouldn’t matter.

SHIT I CAN'T MAKE UP: Convo between my 7year-old students today

Sun, 10 Jun 2012 19:47:41 -0400

(Names have been altered slightly, just in case.)
Josie: I have a new crusshhhhh
Matt: Me too! On a boy!
Pearl: You're a boy with a crush on a boy?
Matt: Yeah he's really cute.
Pearl: Oh.
(pause for a bit)
Matt: Boys can like boys. I just can't marry him because boys can't marry boys.
Me: Yeah they can. You can marry whoever you want.
Matt: Really?
Josie: YEAH my tia has a wife so now I have a titi and a auntie.
Matt: Okay. Then maybe I'll marry him.
Dave: (from across the room) No you can't you're seven.
(Age was apparently the only foreseeable problem anyone of my elementary schoolers could see with gay marriage. I almost cried out of happiness. Later, when I was asked if boys could kiss anyone they wanted, I replied "only if they want to kiss you back." And Josie responded "Yeah! Your body your life.")
My students are the shit.

wowfunniestposts: funniest blog ever

Sun, 10 Jun 2012 19:46:12 -0400

wowfunniestposts:

funniest blog ever

thinking bout this earlier weren’t we bruv? :)

Sun, 10 Jun 2012 19:16:14 -0400

thinking bout this earlier weren’t we bruv? :)

Photo

Sun, 10 Jun 2012 19:07:42 -0400

Photo

Sun, 10 Jun 2012 18:58:48 -0400

Best :)

Sun, 10 Jun 2012 18:55:44 -0400

Best :)

wowfunniestposts: what a funny blog

Sun, 27 May 2012 05:38:33 -0400

wowfunniestposts:

what a funny blog

Differences between normal people and me:

Sun, 27 May 2012 05:27:32 -0400

Differences between normal people and me::

wowfunniestposts:

Normal people when they laugh:

Me:

Normal people when they see their idol:

Me:

Normal people when they know someone likes them:

Me :

“Why?”

Normal people dancing:

Me:

Normal people walking:

Me:

Normal people who are pissed off:

Me :

what a funny blog

All of these are just so true

wowfunniestposts: Bored? click! Just love it ….

Sun, 27 May 2012 05:23:02 -0400

wowfunniestposts:

Bored? click!

Just love it ….

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Tue, 08 May 2012 11:39:14 -0400

simply made me laugh….

Mon, 07 May 2012 17:18:00 -0400

simply made me laugh….

"WHAT WOULD JESUS DO? may be a good philosophy of life for some but I find it rarely helps me decide..."

Mon, 07 May 2012 17:16:38 -0400

“WHAT WOULD JESUS DO?
may be a good philosophy of life for some but I find it rarely helps me decide
HOW MUCH TO TIP A HOOKER”

- Charles Gulledge